"No one is further from the truth than the one who knows all the answers." -Zhuangzi
Every leader has a dark side.
I tell myself this, even though saying it a thousand times does not necessarily mean I internalize it.
Since childhood, I have pursued positions of authority. In each pursuit, I told myself that my desire was completely noble. And perhaps it was.
However, one recurring theme in the past 80 issues of Moneyball Judaism is our inherent difficulty in maintaining objectivity about ourselves. So, let’s pretend that because you are an avid reader of Moneyball Judaism, you want to bring all these tools to your organization to help people think better and make more rational decisions.
What could be wrong with that?
Potentially, a lot.
Motivations are not necessarily either/or propositions. As a result, it’s possible that while I want to teach Moneyball Judaism because I genuinely believe it will help others, an outsider could see this project simply as an exercise in showing off my erudition or merely a soapbox to opine on a variety of issues under the guise of “data.”
And maybe they're right.
That’s funny about facts and data: They can easily go to my head.
And yours, for that matter.
Clearness Committee
Imagine grappling with a significant decision that feels clouded by uncertainty, whether it's related to your family, career, or personal beliefs. Despite our best efforts, we often cannot escape the subjective narratives in our minds.
Maybe the best approach is to admit that we cannot do it alone.
Enter the Clearness Committee, a practice rooted in the Quaker tradition.
Traditionally, Clearness Committees are convened when an individual wants a group of Friends to come together “in a spirit of worship, listening, and loving concern” so that the individual can test “for clarity around making personal decisions.”1 While Quakers, or anyone for that matter, might convene a Clearness Committee around matters related to faith and religion, ultimately, the process can be used for any decision. Here is a helpful video guide:
Thus, a Clearness Committee might sound like various models for receiving personal feedback. However, what distinguishes a Clearness Committee from other feedback models is that participants should ask questions that avoid judgment (i.e. “Have you ever thought about this because you are X”) or solutions (i.e. “If I were you, I would do X because…”). The questions should be designed to help people discover the wisdom within. Parker Palmer writes:
“Behind the Clearness Committee is a simple but crucial conviction: each of us has an inner teacher, a voice of truth, that offers the guidance and power we need to deal with our problems. But that inner voice is often garbled by various kinds of inward and outward interference. The function of the Clearness Committee is not to give advice or “fix” people from the outside in but rather to help people remove the interference so that they can discover their own wisdom from the inside out. If we do not believe in the reality of inner wisdom, the Clearness Committee can become an opportunity for manipulation. But if we respect the power of the inner teacher, the Clearness Committee can be a remarkable way to help someone name and claim his or her deepest truth.”2
As we learned in last week’s issue about the affect heuristic, our emotions are always the first to start driving the bus, and only later do we try to bring rationality into the picture. However, people who care about us and can see our challenges from a blank slate possess less bias because they are not inside our heads. And if you listen to what a Clearness Committee helps you discover, you can see something previously felt obscure.
The challenge is when those you trust help you see that the problem is more about you than you want to admit.
Let Your Life Speak
Perhaps choosing a book from Parker Palmer surprises you.
I love Parker Palmer, and he’s an amazing writer.
However, choosing a book by Palmer might seem incongruous with the spirit of Moneyball Judaism. While I have no idea what Palmer thinks about analytics, data-driven decision-making, and behavioral economics, his writings, particularly his book Let Your Life Speak, are an invaluable supplement to my normal reading diet.
In Let Your Life Speak, Palmer challenges leaders to remember that each of us has a shadow, a dark side to even our most noble ambitions, and can fall victim to a “dangerous delusion…that our efforts are always well intended.”3 Reading it, I was in shock:
“What do you mean by efforts are not always well-intended?”
“I’m a rabbi! I chose to work in a world where all we want to do is good.”
“How dare you, Parker Palmer!?!?!”
If you are currently having the same reaction, take a breath.
Belly breathe, if necessary:
Palmer argues that since most leaders operate in environments “for which one is regularly criticized and rarely rewarded…it is understandable that we need to bolster ourselves with positive thoughts.”4 At the same time, too many positive thoughts can cause leaders to forget that not all motivations are pure, and when things go wrong, those same leaders might start to believe that “the problem is always in those difficult people whom we are trying to lead.”5 Ironically, total confidence in one’s purity of character can lead one down a divergent path from the kinds of leaders we seek to be.
Parker’s notions of shadow and light help me continually reassess key moments in my leadership journey. While I feel modest confidence that I genuinely care about others and want to empower them, when I forget that there is still that smart part of me that wants to be a “one-man wrecking crew,” driving forward with no concern about who I push aside.
Sound familiar? Good.
Palmer also argues that it is better to name the shadow than ignore it, because “If we do not understand that the enemy is within, we will find a thousand ways of making someone "out there" into the enemy, becoming leaders who oppress rather than liberate others.”6
Sadly, some of my most tragic leadership moments came when someone I cared about and I turned each other into enemies due to our false confidence in our purity of character.
Perhaps Palmer’s concept conjures an image of someone currently or formerly in a position of authority you could not stand. Perhaps that person was eventually exposed as a fraud, or perhaps they are succeeding, and only you cannot see it. Either way, there is an instinct to read Palmer’s quote and direct one’s mental image outward rather than inward.
Resist that temptation. You won’t regret it.
The Good Life
13%
In a survey by compensation consultant Pearl Meyer, 13% of employers said they are giving employees “dry promotions,” where employees receive more “prestigious job” titles and bigger responsibilities (without receiving a pay increase.)
What I Read This Week
The Hunt for Tupac’s Killer: Sometimes leadership is best studied through real-world situations. And how one of the world’s best rappers was murdered when I was in middle school, but the case was not solved until a few months ago, is a question we should all explore.
The Power of Empowered Refusal: I have never heard this term before, but after reading this article, I will use it more.
Why Outstanding Professionals Fail and Mediocre Ones Succeed: Yes, it’s clickbait. But I found it thought-provoking.
The Power of Proper Pronunciation: Sometimes, getting a person’s name right has a big impact. Read more.
Gender Affirming Surgeries Reduce Suicides: The title says it all.
Ibid., 728-729.
Ibid.
Ibid., 740-741.